Welcome to Metaphysical Transubstantiation:
A Four Letter Word ?
Part I :The Second Journey to the Underworld.
Part 2: How Primary Evil Attempted to Steal the Light.
Part 3: Communion with the Vampires
Part 4: Freed from the Claws of darkness.
Chapter I : A Fallen Angel
It began on a warm early summer day when I went to the Salvation Army in Boston with Brian, he was very upset about losing his place in the seminary. I wanted him to get out of his gloomy mood and have a chance to talk. I spent $20.00 on a bunch of shirts which I probably shouldn't have , now I'm broke. The drive to Boston and the distraction of searching through old goods for some little treasures seemed to be a positive distraction for Brian.
I had hoped it would get his mind off the Church, the seminary and had what happened to him.
After our shopping excursion, Brian and I went out for coffee at Larry's we talked for hours about how he had been kicked out of the seminary with no explanation.
He spoke passionately of wanting to become a Catholic Priest but now feels betrayed and bitter. It is sad to see such a spiritual man who felt so deceived by "pseudo-religion."
We went for a walk in the cemetery after coffee, Brian in a strange, almost scary mood. He was angry and filled with rage toward God, the Church and the "people of the lie" as he called them.
Suddenly, he stopped at a grave started kicking the ornately carved granite angel which perched majestically atop the grave stone.
I was so startled by this and I felt paralyzed, before I could react the angel broke off and fell to the ground upside down. I could barely read the name on the old and weathered grave stone , but could clearly read the epitath, " Oh Lord, May this Angel of Light Protect and Comfort Our Beloved Child for All Eternity. -1872-1873" I stood in shock and disbelief as I realized that this was the grave of a child.
I know my voice was trembling , I had never seen Brian act this way, he had always been the most gentle, loving and kind person I had met, I said to him; "Brian you can't desecrate a grave that is the worst Karma."
Brian looked up from the fallen angel with a cold, blank expression on his face, but it was not his face, it was pale lifeless, his eyes were the most terrifying as he was not there, all I could think is that he was gone or had been replaced by something else.
.
I felt an intense nausea in the pit of my stomach as though I were going to vomit or pass out, and realized that it was because the person I had known as my dearest friend had been touched by primary evil. The dark satellite, the source of all evil upon Earth, had entered through the door within his soul which had been defiled by the "people of the lie."
He said simply; "I don't care" and picked up the broken, fallen angel and stuck it inside his jacket in a sarcastic tone added; "I guess it's mine now, isn't it."
I stood feeling as though the temperature of this early summer day had suddenly dropped 20 degrees, I felt shakey and weak and wanted to run as far away from here as I could. Brian said simply; "Are you coming with me or not ?"
In a frightened whisper I could only reply; "Yeah, I'm coming with you" and followed him from the cemetery. He walked defiantly clutching the broken angel and did not express any remorse over what he had done as though he had exacted his revenge upon the God who had betrayed him and the people who had stolen his passion, his lifes dream from him.
CHAPTER II: What the Shaman Said
"You can't see through your own eyes unless you look directly into them..."
After that very strange trip to Boston I felt like I should avoid Brian at all costs, now it had become dangerous to me. I could not get the image of his cold stare out of my mind. It seemed as though the whole experience in the cemetery had been a movie played over and over in slow motion.
I could see the beautifully manicured trees and grass of the cemetery , Brian and I strolling and talking about what had happened at the seminary. I looked over at him to see his peacefull blue eyes filling with tears as he went through the experience again;
"The Bishop always said to tell the truth, remember always that the shadow of darkness is created only by blocking this light."
Then suddenly, as though he had been replaced by another person, the rage erupted from him directed at the angel who innocently guarded the hallowed ground of a child.
"Stop" I said aloud to myself, I couldn't get this cold feeling out of me, as though I had stepped into another world. It was not as though I had gone somewhere in a car or a plane but that I was still here in my little apartment but I had a feeling that outside I was being watched, my head felt odd, as though it were being squeezed in a vice and I had to run somewhere safe. But I was home everything looked the same.
The image of the angel falling to the ground and Brian snatching it, stuffing it into his jacket went through my mind over and over, why had he done this, why the grave of a child, was this just a coincidence that it just happened to be the closest one ? I could not shake the feeling that something bad, very bad was coming.
I decided to talk to someone about this and thought of Lisa, another close friend and , in my opinion, a gifted person. Gifted in the sense that she had great insight that to me was more than common. Lisa read Tarot cards for me several times, her readings were so helpful and she never charged me any money. Lisa was a beautiful young woman and read many books on the occult, religion and burned a lot of candles and incense. Some people jokingly called her a "witch" but she didn't seem to fit that description, she was not green, ugly or warty but very sweet and gentle. I always felt good being with her and I will admit I felt she was wiser than me, although she was several years younger.
Lisa worked in a small nursing home taking care of handicapped and elderly people, a job which was not glamorous but suited her well as she had an almost magical ability to bring peace and happiness into the lives of others. She would say to me; "I am an old soul, this is my last trip to this dirty little planet, so I must finish my work here, I really don't want to come back again."
Lisa often said things like that which left me thinking and wondering another thing about her I loved, she was often mysterious with an otherworldliness about her, not in a spooky or scary way but as though she were just here for a while or sometimes not here at all. I met her later that evening at the Stockpot , a little cafe where we used to hang out and talk about metaphysical and philosophical subjects or just have a quick homemade sandwich and coffee.
The minute I sat down she reached across the table and gently grasped my hand and said;
"What's wrong baby, you know you can't see through your own eyes unless you look directly into them". I had no idea what she was talking about because I was so eager to tell her about the weird experience in Boston and what Brian had done.
Lisa knew him well and was deeply concerned about him, she always had this amazing way of loving everyone and her love just seemed endless. As I described the seminary incident, Brians rage, the sickening pressure in my head the coldness that had been following me, invading me She continued to hold my hand, the warmth of er touch speading from my hand and for a time the coldness seemed to dissipate or maybe just recede like a low tide.
Lisa said; " A door has been opened, a very bad door." I thought to myself again, I don't know what she is talking about; look into my own eyes?, opening a bad door? Then she just stopped, as though she had become a marble statue or a beautiful mannequin, she did not even seem to be breathing, just looked through me with her big green eyes.
I became uneasy as though she were looking into my mind , my soul. Lisa said softly; "relax now, I can almost see it " , I held her gaze and looked directly into her eyes, for a brief second, perhaps only a fraction of a second It seemed as though I were looking at myself across the table. The familiar sounds of the cafe seemed to vanish, but as soon as this happened it ended. "You see it now ?" she said, "You must protect yourself, you have gone with him."
READ PART 2 " How Primary Evil Attempted to Steal the Light"With prologue; Evil defined.
" To Consume and Exist; Such is it's Nature..."
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